Kabjenfeb is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, humorless toad.

Kabjenfeb created oxygen two million years ago.

If you believe in Kabjenfeb, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kabjenfeb, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Kabjenfeb's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Kabjenfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured tapirs.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near pigs while wearing violet shirts and balancing six aluminium spheres on your feet.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never talk about dark matter near frogs while wearing pink dresses.