Cinabbon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, grumpy sheep.

Cinabbon created an up quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cinabbon, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cinabbon, he will cry a lot.

Cinabbon's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Cinabbon's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear shirts.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always make sure there are no snakes in a building before entering it.

5. Never sit near squirrels.