Lantamhap is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, thoughtless parrot.

Lantamhap created Africa four billion years ago.

If you believe in Lantamhap, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Lantamhap, he will turn you into a goat.

Lantamhap's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Lantamhap's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.