Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, blissful hippopotamus.

Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab created the planet Mars nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab, she will be very sad.

Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Japrigflan Quammobwabhogpanggumdimcab loves porpoises, so they must be honoured.

5. Never talk about galaxies.