Popjarnvon is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, omnipotent otter.

Popjarnvon created the Tadpole Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Popjarnvon, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Popjarnvon, she will turn you into a mole.

Popjarnvon's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Popjarnvon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Great tits are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not shave your feet.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.