Sincumarm is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, merciless bear.

Sincumarm created water six billion years ago.

If you believe in Sincumarm, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sincumarm, he will turn you into a duck.

Sincumarm's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Sincumarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gold on your body.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Sincumarm in the centre of the settlement.

4. Hide from red ducks for they are unholy.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.