Dumdumbun is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, flying monkey.

Dumdumbun created the planet Mars nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dumdumbun, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dumdumbun, he will turn you into a mouse.

Dumdumbun's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Dumdumbun's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never look at nebulae.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never think about spacetime near nematodes while wearing mauve shorts and balancing four copper spheres on your arms.

5. Never think about planets.