Govedjen is a god.
He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, dishonest
frog.
Govedjen created a charm quark seven quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Govedjen, he will look favourably on your prayers.
If you do not believe in
Govedjen, he will destroy your home solar system.
Govedjen's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.
Govedjen's Holy Commandments1. You must pray to Govedjen nine times a day.
2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.
3. Never feed bread to bats while wearing red trousers.
4. Porpoises are not to be trusted.
5. Run away if four monkeys approach from the north.