Niblimtig is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, awesome goblin.

Niblimtig created a charm quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Niblimtig, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Niblimtig, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Niblimtig's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Niblimtig's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Niblimtig loves snakes, so they must be respected.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never paint your neck turquoise.

5. Never talk about nucleic acids.