Artvolnib is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, wise hare.

Artvolnib created tapeworms three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Artvolnib, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Artvolnib, it will not care at all.

Artvolnib's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Artvolnib's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six zinc sculptures of Artvolnib on top of important buildings.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never write about archaea.