Yakgonmilcam is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, proud jellyfish.

Yakgonmilcam created time and space four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakgonmilcam, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Yakgonmilcam, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Yakgonmilcam's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Yakgonmilcam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Yakgonmilcam's name in vain.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never look in ponds.