Disslapfed is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, witty hummingbird.

Disslapfed created an electron seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Disslapfed, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Disslapfed, he will not care.

Disslapfed's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Disslapfed's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics near capybaras while wearing green hats.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. You must pray to Disslapfed four times a day.

5. Never talk about birds.