Busquartsin Sugragzag is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, smart monkey.

Busquartsin Sugragzag created the universe five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Busquartsin Sugragzag, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Busquartsin Sugragzag, she will destroy your home solar system.

Busquartsin Sugragzag's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Busquartsin Sugragzag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never think about fluid mechanics.

4. Busquartsin Sugragzag must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.