Teensandbundap is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, emotional wren.

Teensandbundap created light four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Teensandbundap, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Teensandbundap, he will destroy your home solar system.

Teensandbundap's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Teensandbundap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silver on your body.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. You must love Teensandbundap.