Mabgardid is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, humorless salamander.

Mabgardid created carbon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mabgardid, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Mabgardid, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Mabgardid's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Mabgardid's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never wear stockings.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never go into fawn rooms.