Wodquatmob Zodvabpit is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, awesome troll.

Wodquatmob Zodvabpit created vertebrates seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodquatmob Zodvabpit, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wodquatmob Zodvabpit, it will throw large rocks at you.

Wodquatmob Zodvabpit's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Wodquatmob Zodvabpit's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never wear trousers.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Never eat peanuts.