Mislarpnulkan Nibhandad Fembetmig is a god.

It takes the form of a large, emotional mink.

Mislarpnulkan Nibhandad Fembetmig created life four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mislarpnulkan Nibhandad Fembetmig, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Mislarpnulkan Nibhandad Fembetmig, it will send you a sign.

Mislarpnulkan Nibhandad Fembetmig's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Mislarpnulkan Nibhandad Fembetmig's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not keep six mice in a large pit.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never think about dark matter near monkeys while wearing green shirts and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your legs.

5. Do not speak about lentils.