Tailranlam is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, emotional guinea pig.

Tailranlam created the planet Jupiter five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tailranlam, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Tailranlam, he will manifest in front of you.

Tailranlam's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Tailranlam's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Tailranlam loves geese, so they must be honoured.