Kanfetgudsidbenlat is a god.

She takes the form of a large, almighty troll.

Kanfetgudsidbenlat created light five billion years ago.

If you believe in Kanfetgudsidbenlat, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Kanfetgudsidbenlat, she will destroy your home solar system.

Kanfetgudsidbenlat's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Kanfetgudsidbenlat's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Put Kanfetgudsidbenlat first in all things.

3. Never write about planets.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.