Cenquimban is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, annoying faun.

Cenquimban created the solar system five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cenquimban, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cenquimban, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Cenquimban's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Cenquimban's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Cenquimban loves snails, so they must be respected.

5. You must love Cenquimban.