Arfsignurl is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, all-powerful narwhal.

Arfsignurl created a photon three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arfsignurl, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Arfsignurl, he will turn you into a plant.

Arfsignurl's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Arfsignurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into magenta rooms.

2. Do not hop in public.

3. Always help snails in need.

4. Always look after injured bats.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.