Lenvonkdad is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, pitiless crab.

Lenvonkdad created oxygen eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lenvonkdad, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Lenvonkdad, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Lenvonkdad's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Lenvonkdad's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never think ill of sick badgers.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always help hamsters.

5. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.