Rotflandiss is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, selfish lion.

Rotflandiss created a quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Rotflandiss, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Rotflandiss, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Rotflandiss' most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Rotflandiss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep three tapirs in a large pit.

2. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Rotflandiss on top of all buildings.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.