Nellzogwig is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, humane wombat.

Nellzogwig created a charm quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nellzogwig, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Nellzogwig, he will curse you with boils.

Nellzogwig's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Nellzogwig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear tin on your body.

2. Never hop near snakes.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never wear coats.