Loopkomzog is a god.
He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, contented
eagle.
Loopkomzog created Africa seven quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Loopkomzog, he will ignore you.
If you do not believe in
Loopkomzog, he will turn you into a mouse.
Loopkomzog's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.
Loopkomzog's Holy Commandments1. Do not speak about oranges.
2. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.
3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.
4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.
5. Always help nematodes in need.