Loptad is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, clever gnu.

Loptad created humanity four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Loptad, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Loptad, it will cry a lot.

Loptad's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Loptad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Monkeys are not to be trusted.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not bounce in public.