Yarpkimbog is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, unsympathetic eagle.

Yarpkimbog created the Andromeda Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarpkimbog, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yarpkimbog, it will throw large rocks at you.

Yarpkimbog's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Yarpkimbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Erect a large tin sculpture of Yarpkimbog on top of all buildings.

3. Always wear yellow.

4. Never write about chlorophyll.

5. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.