Jinpakgat is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, self-confident fairy.

Jinpakgat created the universe two years ago.

If you believe in Jinpakgat, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Jinpakgat, she will turn you into a slug.

Jinpakgat's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Jinpakgat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near porpoises while wearing indigo kilts and balancing nine copper spheres on your neck.

4. Do not drink water in black rooms.

5. Feed all hungry capybaras.