Likmumyarp is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, conceited bird.

Likmumyarp created the Andromeda Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Likmumyarp, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Likmumyarp, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Likmumyarp's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Likmumyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove skirts before touching zinc.

2. Never proclaim while facing west.

3. Do not kill ants.

4. Never pray while filled with fear.

5. Do not commit murder.