Tonpanwod is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, humane monkey.

Tonpanwod created silver three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonpanwod, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tonpanwod, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Tonpanwod's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Tonpanwod's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about dark energy.

2. Put Tonpanwod first in all things.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tonpanwod.

5. Pray towards the south.