Lakpadtof is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, capable mink.

Lakpadtof created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lakpadtof, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lakpadtof, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Lakpadtof's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Lakpadtof's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never look at dwarf planets.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never eat tomatoes.