Fobpinmip is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, merciful beaver.

Fobpinmip created dark matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fobpinmip, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Fobpinmip, he will destroy your home planet.

Fobpinmip's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Fobpinmip's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never think ill of sick gulls.

3. Put Fobpinmip first in all things.

4. Do not dye your hair brown.

5. Never go into black rooms.