Larpsugtad is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, vain dolphin.

Larpsugtad created a photon nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Larpsugtad, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Larpsugtad, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Larpsugtad's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Larpsugtad's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never go into violet rooms.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never think about gravity near gulls while wearing brown ear rings and balancing six gold spheres on your head.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.