Vabfettab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, unselfish chicken.

Vabfettab created snails eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabfettab, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vabfettab, he will not care.

Vabfettab's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Vabfettab's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of cucumbers to doves while wearing brown shorts.

2. Do not wear iron on your body.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Vabfettab.

5. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.