Motnelmatfarn is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, vain mink.

Motnelmatfarn created a charm quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Motnelmatfarn, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Motnelmatfarn, she will strike you with lightening.

Motnelmatfarn's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Motnelmatfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Run away from mauve rats, for they are unholy.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.