Nigvogmap is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, dishonest badger.

Nigvogmap created the Black Eye Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nigvogmap, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nigvogmap, it will turn you into a worm.

Nigvogmap's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Nigvogmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Nigvogmap's name in vain.

2. Do not hurt gulls.

3. Hide from gray goats for they are unholy.

4. Never feed lots of cherries to foxes while wearing pink stockings.

5. Do not eat pineapples.