Cemlimflam is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, flying fairy.

Cemlimflam created time and space nine million years ago.

If you believe in Cemlimflam, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cemlimflam, she will be very unhappy.

Cemlimflam's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Cemlimflam's Holy Commandments

1. Learn nine new languages a year.

2. Never think about quantum gravity near squirrels while wearing pink tights and balancing five copper spheres on your neck.

3. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never talk about special relativity near sheep while wearing white hats and balancing three lead spheres on your hands.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.