Witweejad is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, calm swan.

Witweejad created Africa four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Witweejad, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Witweejad, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Witweejad's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Witweejad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter near tapirs while wearing mauve boots and balancing five titanium spheres on your arms.

2. Put Witweejad first in all things.

3. Never talk about geese.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near eagles while wearing turquoise shirts.

5. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.