Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, proud faun.

Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad created the Sol system seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt shrews.

2. Do not dye your hair purple.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gofteenladjipvenortfigcad.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never write about galaxies.