Gomrip is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, generous meerkat.

Gomrip created light five million years ago.

If you believe in Gomrip, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Gomrip, it will send you a sign.

Gomrip's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Gomrip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never wear coats.

3. Do not wear blue clothing.

4. Never write about chlorophyll.

5. Always help sick dogs.