Nuldodben is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, temperamental clam.

Nuldodben created gold nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuldodben, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Nuldodben, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Nuldodben's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Nuldodben's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nematodes.

2. Never eat limes.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Nuldodben.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate sheep.