Tinpadster is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, dishonest squirrel.

Tinpadster created a charm quark two years ago.

If you believe in Tinpadster, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Tinpadster, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Tinpadster's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Tinpadster's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear rings.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.

3. Tinpadster loves snails, so they must be honoured.

4. Never talk about chromosomes.

5. Do not trade with those who eat grapes.