Fetnuttab is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, loving monkey.

Fetnuttab created the Cigar Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fetnuttab, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Fetnuttab, he will send you a sign.

Fetnuttab's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Fetnuttab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not keep five rats in a large pit.

4. Do not take Fetnuttab's name in vain.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.