Panwotnilhinfen is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, duplicitous seal.

Panwotnilhinfen created the planet Mars two years ago.

If you believe in Panwotnilhinfen, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Panwotnilhinfen, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Panwotnilhinfen's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Panwotnilhinfen's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat figs.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never write about nebulae.

4. Run away if four cats approach from the north.

5. Panwotnilhinfen loves shrews, so they must be respected.