Jannutrak is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, fussy porpoise.

Jannutrak created the world five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jannutrak, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Jannutrak, she will turn you into a mole.

Jannutrak's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Jannutrak's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never write about dark energy.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Do not trade with those who eat peas.