Watlidarm is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, caring capybara.

Watlidarm created a Higgs boson five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Watlidarm, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Watlidarm, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Watlidarm's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Watlidarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in the presence of tortoises.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never feed peas to bats while wearing orange ear rings.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not drink alcohol.