Garfobdiss is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, caring wren.

Garfobdiss created a bottom quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Garfobdiss, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Garfobdiss, he will boil you in a big pot.

Garfobdiss' most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Garfobdiss' Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms pink.

2. You must love Garfobdiss.

3. Always look after injured aardvarks.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Retreat if three cats approach from the north.