Tadteenmifcet is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, charitable bat.

Tadteenmifcet created the planet Mars four million years ago.

If you believe in Tadteenmifcet, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tadteenmifcet, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Tadteenmifcet's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Tadteenmifcet's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if six capybaras approach from the east.

2. Never hurt ducks.

3. Do not hurt swans.

4. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.

5. Never feed lots of corn to mice while wearing mauve hats.