Tifjarn is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, wise grasshopper.

Tifjarn created a bottom quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tifjarn, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tifjarn, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tifjarn's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Tifjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

2. Never talk about gravity.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Never hurt shrews.

5. Put Tifjarn first in all things.