Wikmitweg is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, impressive dugong.

Wikmitweg created everything that exists two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wikmitweg, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wikmitweg, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Wikmitweg's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Wikmitweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force near squirrels while wearing green shoes and balancing nine silicon spheres on your face.

2. Never feed lemons to dolphins while wearing cyan ear rings.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never mention doves.

5. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.